Journal Entry: Thu Aug 28, 2014, 10:25 PM
An above average episode of iMPACT, but still felt lackluster.
This episode I really have no big complaints about (other than a few things). There wasn't too many story line set ups going on, and what little there were it was pretty short and sweet, which is welcome. We all know TNA's weak-point is story and booking. Having said that, there was ALOT of talking in this episode, and since I JUST said there wasn't must story going on, it was mainly fluff. So there were long spots of nothing.
We start off the show with Kurt Angle in the crowd announcing the nights matches, and explaining that he wanted to talk to Bobby Roode and Eric Young about last weeks 6-Sides of Steel non-finish. MVP comes out with Kenny King and Bobby Lashley to basically take a shit on the New York City crowd. I imagine if you were there it would have been entertaining. On TV it's 3 minutes of waiting for a wrestler to come out to tell them to stop. AND it happens. Tommy Dreamer comes out. After he sucks everyone's dick in the ring (saying how great they are) he tells them to stop dogging NYC. Kenny King attacks him because of reasons, and Angle announces that Dreamer will face Lashley in a Street Fight.....because we can't give Kenny King a match, instead we're going to make our WHC wrestle the opening match. Once again superb booking by TNA.
Bobby Lashley vs Tommy Dream in a NYC Street Fight. How do you think this went? This is Tommy Dreamer we're talking about here. The only people who loses less than him is 3MB. Lashley soundly finishes Dreamer off, without any weapons. Dreamer took out his toys and did use them, but Lashley basically no-sold them. There was some tricky business with King and MVP, but overall Lashley just crushed him. One weird spot in the match was MVP distracting the referee so King could do something to Dreamer... in a Street Fight... which is no DQ... as Lashley delivered a low-blow on the barricade earlier. BUT I've come to expect stuff like this from TNA. You can't expect them to remember the rules they set up.
Winner: Bobby Lashley because he was wrestling Tommy Dreamer
Next we get a backstage segment with Madison Rayne talking about how she's in a number one contenders match with Taryn Terrell for the Knockouts Title. As usual, this is the first we're hearing about it. Tenay and Taz are acting like this was something everyone should know. And it's next.
But not before we have a Samuel Shaw and Gunner pre-tapped segment in Gunners room. Shaw is drawing in Gunner's room for some reason, and Gunner decides to get a drink. The moment he leaves Shaw goes to Gunner's closet and looks a military uniform. .... Why the fuck is this story still going? Honestly?
Madison Rayne vs Taryn Terrell in a Number One Contender's Match for the Knockout Championship. Since this had literally no build up, it was kind of hard to get into this. Especially with Madison Rayne in the ring. It was sadly apparent that she wasn't on the same level as Taryn and she kept botching spots. The crowd at one point started chanting "We Want Puppies", thus taking women's wrestling back ten years in the process. By the mid-way point Madison is tanked and it's all Taryn can do to keep the match going. Taryn wins with, no lie, an RKO. Not a cutter variation. It was a flatout RKO.
Winner: Taryn Terrell cleanly
We get the first of three Bobby Roode and Eric Young segments talking about how they are going to resolve which one of them will be the number one contender for the World Heavyweight Title. It's obvious they are going to have a match but for some reason TNA is prolonging this. Anyway, all this segment did was get EY and Roode into Angle's office.
We return to Gunner entering in on Shaw, who's now wearing the military uniform. Gunner gets pisses and that's it. Once again.... what the fuck?
Six-Man Tag X-Division Match Basically this came out of nowhere and it's the same exact match we got last week. Though this time they didn't eliminate each other. As expected the only person who could win this match is Low Ki since he only loses to Samoa Joe. I'm not getting into this. If TNA didn't care about it and just whipped this up to fill time, I won't care either.
Winner: Low Ki
We get the second of three Roode/EY segments. This time they are coming out of Angle's office. I'm on the edge of my seat. And that's all that happens.
Next is a video re-cap of EC3 attacking Rhino last week. Afterwards Rhino has a backstage promo, talking about revenge. This was actually a good promo from him, as last week I felt he was a bit weak.
The final Roode/EY segment of the night happens, this time in ring. It should be noted that already posted on the screen is #RoodeVsEY. Gee, I wonder what they are going to say? SpikeTV at their greatest. Anyway, they announce the obvious then stand in the ring and suck each other off for 8 minutes. There is a lot of this ass kissing going on tonight. First Dreamer, now these two. More happens later on...
Next is probably one of the most confusing segments of the night. The BroMans are doing some online dating thing, competing on who has the most girls... I think. They have a draw, and apparently in the que of girls they "won" they both got Knockouts. So Jesse and Robby decide they'll go out with the Knockout dates, and try to out-do each other. I think. The segment ends and I have no clue what that was all about. Still makes as much sense as this Samuel Shaw nonsense.
EC3 vs Rhino. The funniest thing is that both Angle and Tenay are calling this a Grudge match, as if it were weeks of build up. You and I know this is a recent thing, as in last episode. It's an average match. It's not all that great though because Rhino sort tanked out the last 3rd of the match. EC3 carried him until the screwy finish were he DQs himself by beating Rhino repeatedly with a chair (after a low-blow). Guess the "grudge" is still on... lol. Whatever.
Winner: Rhino via DQ
We get an announcement that Chris Melendez will debut tonight. Since this is the first time of hearing about this it's hard to care, especially since I have no idea who he is. More on that later.
James Storm, the new Manager of Sanada, comes out and started talking about "The New Revolution" again. Only this time he sort of (but not really) explains what the fuck he's talking about. Basically he's collecting wrestlers who haven't caught on and re-packaging them. With Sanada he steals The Great Muta's gimmick, and slaps cheap face paint on him. Thrilling.
The Great Sanada vs Austin Ares. For this being a squash match for Sanada, I was surprised they asked Ares to come out there and eat a pinfall. Then again, TNA doesn't know what a squash match is. Ares and Sanada wrestle a typical cruiserweight type match for half of it until they realize this is supposed to get Sanada over as a heel. Then at the last part of it, Sanada steals The Great Muta's green mist and finisher. It's a good match but really was bad storytelling. Not sure why Ares was in on this, and why Sanada didn't just steamroll over Jesse or someone.
Winner: The Great Sanada via shady methods
After this match we FINALLY get to see Chris Melendez! That 10 minute wait really got me curious! Turns out he's an army veteran who got his leg blown off in Iraq... and he wants to wrestle. Shades of Zack Gowan float in my mind. BUT he doesn't wrestle, so it's not really a debut. Team 3D, Ken Anderson, and Kurt Angle are in the ring, and basically for 10 minutes they suck this guy off. I told you it'd happen again. After they jizz red, white, and blue we move on.
Triple Threat Match featuring The Wolves, Team 3D, and The Hardyz. As you'd expect this is a good match, but it's obvious the Wolves are carrying this and taking most of the bumps. Team 3D and The Hardy take turns tagging in to isolate them. This goes on for most of the match until the end when everyone gets chaotic and does a bunch of spots. I noticed that the Hardyz and Team 3d didn't really lock up. Mostly it was the Hardyz doing the big highflying spots, but since they can't win shit in TNA, it's Team 3D who wins with a The 3D on the Wolves. So they win match one. I predict they win over-all as at the time of this taping, Bully is the top guy... plus Team 3D is going into TNA's Hall of Fame. We'll see.
Winner: Team 3D
Like I said before, it wasn't a bad show, it just had a lot of long boring talking segments that really went on about nothing. And everyone sucking each other off was really a put off. I guess TNA has too many babyfaces at the moment... Time to turn some people to have more interesting feuds. The only bad match really was the Knockouts one, and that was because of Madison Rayne.
Listening to: Yorokobi no Uta - Haruka Tomatsu
Reading: Naoko by Keigo Higashino
Watching: So You Think You Can Dance
Playing: Tales of Symphonia, Lego Marvel, Diablo III